WE MAY BECOME MASTERS OF DESIRE, INSTEAD OF BEING MASTERED BY IT
“What is it that draws me, even against my own will, into delusion?”, asks Arjuna to Lord Krishna.
Lord Krishna answers saying human desires surpass sanity, overtake the minds of mortals and create a confining web which veils our understanding.
The above extract from the great epic of Mahabharat is a portrayal of how desire is capable of disorienting humans, making us perceive reality that is favorable to us. Bhagavad Gita (The Sacred Book of Hindus) also speaks of man’s constantly wavering disposition between the two poles of Tamo Gun and Satvik Gun which either makes one the embodiment of a devil or an angel, respectively.
As every single person is born free, we all are also blessed with the freedom of choice in choosing between good and bad, based on our inclinations, the environment we grow up in, our family, education we acquire, all the other surrounding things that play a role in molding our character.
WHY DO WE WANT WHAT WE WANT?
The desires and wishes we hold dear are an amalgamation of various social impositions and life experiences. Let’s consider for instance the most common dream of every human being, which is to be economically prosperous. We desire to be rich because all around us, the thought of being able to afford all luxuries is glorified.
We celebrate stories that depict heroes rising from “Rags to Riches” or “Gutter to Glitter” as our own.
The point to be noted is that society plays a major role in conditioning what we want. Though there are always exceptions, we cannot definitely ignore the societal role which segregates good and bad or right and wrong.
Second is the life experience that makes us long for something we are deprived of. A child growing up in a bouncy environment may end up in a toxic relationship as pointed by Sigmund Freud, one’s past experience and their way of reacting to the situations greatly influences their future choices.
WHEN THE THRESHOLD BREAKS..
There is a breaking point for everything beyond which even desires become undesirable. If we let our ambitions to master us, we lose control and let ourself at the behest of our desires. It becomes dangerous as we cannot stop anymore even after we achieve our goal. It might sound like a positive reinforcement but in reality it is rather a negative web of desires that we cannot easily get out of.
It is as a result of such insatiable and unquenchable human desires that we witness issues like inequality due to accumulation of wealth, crimes due to passion, increased intolerance among people and so on.
Buddha mooted for stripping off all desires from human mind to make it devoid of any suffering. But is such an ideal way of living really possible? I would rather go with the idea of Golden Mean given by Aristotle, which was also backed by Buddha himself- that is moderation as the key to virtues and avoidance of extremes.
So, between self-indulgence and self-deprivation, we have to choose temperance, which is considered a virtue.
BECOMING MASTERS OF OUR DESIRE
Too much of anything is good for nothing.
We need the discernment to distinguish between our needs and wants. It is not a process that is done overnight. But we should start striving to let go some wishes and hold on to the ones that are worth taking pain for.
Accepting LESS IS MORE, cannot be expected out of every individual as we are intrinsically and inherently different from each other. Also have huge dreams and being ambitious is not wrong either, as the old adage goes, “Sky is the limit”. Today’s world has even broken the limitation of skies and horizons as we keep expanding our footprints.
Back to square one, I would like to recapitulate that we have to choose the Golden mean in every instance to decide upon our needs and wants.
We might enjoy certain comfort foods, but overeating our favorite food can also cause an uneasiness. We have to worry about things we can control. If you are one among those feeling bad every time, after repeating the same mistake you promised to yourself that you wouldn’t repeat, you need to take control of what is within your powers.
We must stop ourself from giving in to those momentary cravings or carnal pleasures as the first step. And after succeeding in these smaller goals, we can find bigger successes in controlling what we want and what we desire.
THERE IS ALWAYS GOING TO BE BOTH LOSS AND GAIN
Plato compares Life to a basket and holes inside the basket to desires. He says that without holes, the basket is filled easily. But the holes make the losses and whatever gets filled despite the holes can be collected only if we mend the holes first, instead of refilling multiple times.
All we need is hence self-awareness of what our desires are, what they can lead to and what we will be left with at the end. With this understanding we can curate our desires and take full authority in achieving them.
As opposed to trying to prevent losses, I suggest we focus on multiplying the gain to the extent that losses do not matter, that they remain intact without expanding further, but we get filled multifold.
